Monday, October 22, 2012

Don't Be So Shallow...Look DEEPER

Have you ever seen insanity where you later saw creativity? What a thought provoking question....
This question forces me to ask myself another....Have I looked beyond the obvious? This question sparks yet another....Is my first impression accurate and true? And again I must ask myself another....Is is possible to know the truth without challenging it first?

Our first impressions are often incorrect...dig a little deeper before you come to a conclusion about a person, or even a situation. Get to know people and step into their situation and I guarantee you that you're going to see things in a different light than you did when you just glanced at it from the outside. We tend to look at the outside layer of things and immediately develop an opinion, which is quite shallow...things go so much deeper than our initial perception. 

I have met people and the first thing I thought was how beautiful or attractive they were....then I got to know them and after a deeper look their looks dwindled...has this ever happened to you? I have looked at situations and made harsh judgements but after climbing into their position I quickly got a new outlook as I was able to see things from another point of view. 

We are generally very shallow and because of this flaw we miss out on the profound beauty that is hidden just underneath the surface of our surroundings. STOP, slow down, and take a deeper look...you're missing out on the finer things in life. You are overlooking some phenomenal individuals...and you're disregarding some sensational situations that have the potential to enhance your life beyond anything you can ever imagine.  Life is beautiful...even in the most unusual places. 


I believe that we miss out on so much in our life times due to small mindedness and tunnel vision. We must ALWAYS remember that there is a bigger picture...that people only show us what they want us to see...and that we can find something new and beautiful in EVERY situation if we will just look a little deeper...investigate a little longer...ask a few more questions and GET TO KNOW what you didn't know so that you can see what you didn't see before!

Unfortunately due to my pretentiousness and superficiality I missed out on a lot of wonderful friendships and wonderful occasions...But now I have vowed to stop and find the hidden treasures in life, in people, and in you! Please extend me and my life the same courtesy---it may look insane from the outside, but on the inside is a creative work of art and a happily ever after... 

Just Bb



Tuesday, October 16, 2012

A Portrait of A Religious Bully. "you're so gay"

Pardon me if this seems harsh...but BULLYING in any form is harsh and I refuse to KEEP SILENT!

October is National Anti-Bullying Awareness Month and I am quite passionate about this subject...always have been. I despise seeing someone being beaten up or picked on because some savage feels as if they are superior to them or knowing that each day there is a kid in the hallway that gets shoved down because they are too thin or too fat.  My heart aches for the teen who gets harassed because he's too smart or wears glasses and the child that is ostracized for being poor. These are cruel acts perpetrated by cruel people.  These are our images of "bullying".  Images that are valid, heartbreaking, "discussion worthy".   What about that young person  though, who is tormented with the cruel words of a classmate, a parent, a PASTOR....calling them  faggot or dyke...QUEER...shaming them because they are gay.... telling them they are doomed!  Maybe this vision of bullying is not so.....clear?  Maybe some are blinded to this vision of bullying because it is a reflection of their very own words or actions?  Maybe so.... and just maybe.. MAYBE.. this is a GROUP of people.. maybe a CONGREGATION of people..

SO........what about that faggot, dyke, QUEER.. who is desperate to find a relationship with Christ?  Yes... that one... only to get the left foot of fellowship by the righteous pharisees at the church on the corner.   Yes THAT one.. the one who put a bullet in his head because he couldn't find hope even in the Church.  Or maybe the OTHER one.. yeah you know her, too... the one that you and your fellow cyber-bullying "fellowship" posted all of those articles and verses condemning her to an eternal hell... did you call them an abomination?  The very definition of that word literally means extremely disgusting; something hated and loathed.  Shame on you.. you BULLY!  ...praise the Lord and pass the potatoes, please.....

ALL you "Religious Bullies" who are "standing up" for what is "right" and BULLYING people in the name of Jesus....Guess what?  You're killing people, (you almost killed me) MY Jesus saves... DO the MATH something is off WAY off! Just because you're hitting someone with a Bible doesn't mean that what you're doing is anything less than BULLYING....period

You know, as I was scrolling on FB today I came across a page that was "Christians Against Bullying" ,which is all well and good, BUT NOT ONCE was the LGBT community included in their fight against bullying...This was not a part of  their "vision"....
If you're going to take on a cause, ESPECIALLY this cause, you MUST take the whole thing and become THE SOLUTION and NOT part of the problem... It breaks my heart that people can be so blind to the damage they cause...their "light" shines so brightly that even they can't see--kinda defeats the purpose...don't ya think

Just Bb


......Bullying is BULLYING doesn't matter how you try to disguise it




And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength.’ This is the first commandment. And the second, like it, is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’There is no other commandment greater than these.” 
Mark 12:30-31...enough said


Please THINK before you speak....Are you're words bringing LIFE or DEATH??








Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Mercy....simple

...‘I desire mercy and not sacrifice...Matt 9:13

Today as I read this I recognized a very clear line between the love of Christ and the hate of religion. In the beginning of this verse the  heart of Christ shines perfectly, as the hate of religion darkens the latter. .... Unfortunately Christians have gotten tangled up in religion and it's rituals in hopes of achieving righteousness, holiness and Christlikeness. Christians, being human and all, have a strange competitive spirit when it comes to the Christian walk (I guess we have forgotten that he who is last is first...)..It is this "I have to be a better Christian than you" mentality that is the very breeding ground for religion and pride.

Somehow, the fact that Jesus washed the feet of Judas gets lost in the race to "perfection" During this tournament of pharisees...mercy get's lost...even crucified. I have heard some starchy, tailored Christians say that they will love people, but they refuse to get down in the ditch and "waller" and the truth is it is impossible to get into a ditch to help a broken person without some wallering and getting dirty. I've heard others say, they refuse to hang out with sinners....WHY? Jesus did...He hangs out with you, doesn't He?

I think that we ALL have this line inside of us, and WE ALL cross it from time to time...THANk GOD for mercy. But, ALWAYS remember that just because you never miss a church service, or you fast once a month, or you pray for one hour a day, or you __________ (fill in the blank) does not mean that you are reflecting the heart of Christ....If you are not LOVING people and extending mercy, all of your sacrifices are worthless...You can speak the language of angels, but if you have not love you have become a clanging noisy cymbal, that NO ONE will listen to or come to.Everywhere He went people came because they heard of His perfect love.... People were drawn to Christ, not because of His sacrifices, but because He loved UNCONDITIONALLY!!

You see LOVE and MERCY go hand in hand....you can't have one without the other


As Jesus was walking along, he saw a man named Matthew sitting at his tax collector’s booth. “Follow me and be my disciple,” Jesus said to him. So Matthew got up and followed him.
 Later, Matthew invited Jesus and his disciples to his home as dinner guests, along with many tax collectors and other disreputable sinners.  But when the Pharisees saw this, they asked his disciples, “Why does your teacher eat with such scum?”
When Jesus heard this, he said, “Healthy people don’t need a doctor—sick people do.” Then he added, “Now go and learn the meaning of this Scripture: ‘I want you to show mercy, not offer sacrifices.’For I have come to call not those who think they are righteous, but those who know they are sinners.”--Matt 9:9-13

People who think that "hanging out with sinners" will harm their "testimony" are DEAD WRONG... Jesus hung out with sinners...WE are the reason that He came!!! 

When you get too "holy" to get in a ditch you better do a heart check... 
When you get too "righteous" to hang out with a sinner you better look in a mirror...
AND thank GOD for mercy

Just Bb








Friday, September 14, 2012

Limited Freedom...Welcome to the USA

This movie, Last Ounce of Courage, was written by a local couple and recently opened all over the our great country.  This movie showcases our Nation's greatest asset...FREEDOM. I think it's crazy cool that this couple has stood up and created a film about the American spirit. I'm so proud to know them, they are amazing people, Christians, in every sense of the word. I haven't seen the movie yet, but I'm sure that God will be glorified in this film! How wonderful it is to live in a Country where you can stand up for what you believe in!


free·dom /ˈfrēdəm/
The power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants without hindrance or restraint. 
synonyms...liberty; independence 

Freedom, it's the heartbeat of the United States. Countless lives have been offered up selflessly by our Nations heroes to protect our liberty, our independence, our FREEDOM. Freedom to worship God, to speak freely about our beliefs, to vote for the leader of our choice. Freedom to speak our minds, freedom to raise our families, freedom to live our lives as we see fit!!! 
Freedom to marry whom we choose????---YES, unfortunately, that is a question mark.....

Why, America, is this even a question? This IS the United States of America! My soldiers have given their lives for my freedom!! FREEDOM, the right to live MY life and LOVE whom I choose... Why can't I marry the woman that I love? How is it, that in the USA, my rights are taken away?! 

I know that many will read this and immediately get angry...but FREEDOM is FREEDOM there are no exceptions or exemptions! You don't have to agree with me to know that what I say is right.... My freedom should not hang on your opinions! Freedom is NOT nor will it ever be a matter of OPINION it is a state of being....it's the spirit of America...the heartbeat that is the USA

I'm proud to be an American, the land of the free? I'm so saddened by the limitations that hang on my freedom. I can only be as free as you allow me to be? I can marry whom you say I can marry? I can love only the one that you approve? I'm sorry but I DO NOT UNDERSTAND this reasoning....It's sanctimonious, at best!

FREEDOM, EQUALITY, and JUSTICE for all,  this is what our COUNTRY, the United States of America, is all about! THIS is what makes our Country magnificent! I LOVE my Country all I'm asking is that I am given the same FREEDOMS as everyone else. 

I am excited about this movie...Last Ounce of Courage! Now I ask you one favor, as you watch it remember that this standard of freedom applies to EVERYONE, not just heterosexuals, not just Christians (BTW I am one), not just______________ you fill in the blank! 

Just Bb

....If you believe in FREEDOM for ALL share this bLOG!!! TAKE a STAND 
www.brandiilyne.blogspot.com 






Friday, September 7, 2012

MOVE ON--The End

To everything there is a season, A time for every purpose under heaven-Ecc 3:1

“I think it happens to everyone as they grow up. You find out who you are and what you want, and then you realize that people you've known forever don't see things the way you do. And so you keep the wonderful memories, but find yourself moving on.” ― Nicholas Sparks

As I read this quote it rang true as I felt a kindred spark in my heart. I believe that this is just where I am in my life right now and this quote triggered a flood of memories, I became somewhat nostalgic...I started thinking about the day I got saved and all the people that were there. I remembered all the times we all prayed together and laughed together, and cried together. I went through some of the toughest times, and had some of the happiest moments of my life with these people and I love them just as much today as I did then. 

My life has taken a new direction, and most of these people no longer agree with it, and I have come to a place where that's ok. I'm so grateful to my Pastors for all the time and prayer that they invested in me; I could never repay them for all the wisdom I gained while under their tutelage and care. My life will never be the same because of them, I am a MUCH better person because of them. They will always have my utmost respect and unconditional love. My only regret is that we have allowed our differences to separate us. But, nevertheless, they remain in my heart and I will NEVER forget what they did in my life. 

I am moving forward with my life and I cherish the memories that I have, not only of my Pastors but of  everyone; you were and will always remain family to me. I love you all but I am going forward... I hope that you can and will do the same. Just because I have walked away does not mean that I no longer love, respect, or appreciate you and the things that you have done in my life...it simply means that my life is taking a new direction and that season in my life is over. My feelings and memories toward you remain the same...I cherish each one! 

I also want to ask you to forgive my foolishness as I have acted out in emotion...We have all found ourselves casting stones back and forth and you have my word that it will not happen again....so please forgive my humanity. I admire everything that you do for this community and God's Kingdom and I wish you the best in your life and your pursuit to reach the lost. I, too, have a vision to reach the lost and I will move forward with that vision and I will continue to pray for your ministry... I hope that you will return the favor!

Again, thank you and I love you--The End
In Christ, 
Just Bb

Friday, August 31, 2012

Make Your Mark Ministries....COMING SOON

“The first of all the commandments is..... you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength.’This is the first commandment. And the second, like it, is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.”
--MARK 12:29-31


Since leaving the church, I have been asked many times, "When are you going to start a ministry?" My answer was always the same..."Soon, I just need time to heal, but soon." So.... "soon" has arrived... IT'S TIME

When I left the church and came out I experienced excruciating rejection from the people that I thought loved me and a community that I struggled to improve. I had NEVER experienced such ridicule and disrespect in my life...and this from my Church "family". These wounds went deep down into my heart, but it's these very wounds that have inspired me....GOD NEVER WASTES A HURT 

This heartbreak has birthed a new passion in me...it has sparked a fire in my very soul! Through this experience I have learned what REAL LOVE is...authentic LOVE and I also learned what it is NOT! 

Love is what Make Your MARK Ministries will be founded upon...(MARK 12:29-31)...Agape Love  

I have been reluctant to step back into ministry for many reasons...but the call of God is strong and relentless....I have felt called to start an all inclusive ministry for a couple of years but I was not in a place where I could; the church I was in was only partly accepting....You could come to church if you were gay...but, in the words of the Pastors, you had to be willing to change.

I want to start a ministry that is RADICALLY INCLUSIVE, and that is what Make Your MARK Ministries will be. 

I know that this ALL INCLUSIVE ministry will be met with much adversity but I also know that this is what I'm called to do. I'm willing to step out of the boat in order to answer that call and create a place where families, regardless of the dynamics, can be accepted, worship together, and experience healthy Christian fellowship.  


I will begin with a Bible Study in my home....We will see what God does with it


Make Your MARK Ministries....coming soon

God Bless You, 
Just Bb 
............Let me know your thoughts




Thursday, August 30, 2012

How DARE YOU!!!

The other day I walked into a restaurant and right in front of me were "church people" These weren't just any "church people" this couple had been extremely close to me. As I walked in they immediately put their heads down and began to stuff their mouths with chips and salsa, pretending they didn't see me.  They acted as if I were a leper, or the invisible man...insignificant...non-existant...or just plain un-important. I suppose they have forgotten all the times I was there when their lives were falling apart...their marriage was in shambles...they were on the verge of going back to prison etc. etc. etc. Or they just forgot that I have a heart....

Just to give a little history, these two were closer to me than anyone.  I gave them my very best and  loved them with everything I had....I still do. I saved one of them from prison and met the other while ministering in the County Jail (she was an inmate awaiting house arrest). I saw the good...despite the obvious... and I poured my life into them. I mentored them and built them up in ministry, placing each of them in leadership. Doing everything possible to help them transform their lives.

 I had spent the better part of 8 years of my life in the proverbial  ditch becoming a Samaritan of sorts; loving and helping those (which included this couple) that no one else would even give the time of day. I spent countless hours interceding and intervening for junkies and drug dealers! Climbing into the mess that they called life and giving them the tools to build new successful lives.

I worked tirelessly raising money to build a successful recovery ministry which includes a recovery center that houses 10 women, in a City that had no place for them. I did all this for the amazingly low price of $101.53 a week...yes that was my salary! I obviously didn't do this because the money was good--I did this because I LOVE...plain and simple. My payday came each time I saw a drug addict build a beautiful life from what was once rubble.

I took care of people...but there was no one to take care of me--My husband was completely inattentive; we were married for 8 years, but were nothing more than roommates for the past 6. Ministry was KILLING ME so I LEFT--I left the church...yes...I fell in love with a woman...yes...these are things that I'm not ashamed of!

This apparently was the unpardonable sin--THE BIG ONE!!!

Who knows...All I know is that I am happy, and I LOVE the one I'm with...which is more than I can say for some.

I will never understand how you can just STOP loving someone, because...well because of anything. Love is LOVE and it has never been temporary, or until you make a mistake, or until I no longer agree with you, or because you pissed me off with your status on Facebook....NO LOVE IS FOREVER and LOVE is UNCONDITIONAL.

I'm sorry if you don't agree with my life--I don't agree with religion, but I LOVE YOU ANYWAY!

How dare you treat me like I'm less than you...let's not forget where you were when I reached down to pick you up!!!

Just Bb